We Americans are a vulnerable and divided people. The election today isn’t just about choosing which politicians should lead us; this is only one issue before us. We have to decide what sort of country we want to be, and how we want to be understood—by ourselves, and by the world.

Domestic political differences are usually superficial and temporary. But the divide we’re seeing doesn’t seem like a momentary rift. We have to heal our deeper rifts and remember that we are one people. If we don’t address these rifts, we will be a country in perpetual crisis, suffering from economic instability and social turmoil. And we will be weak in the face of our actual adversaries. These adversaries know how to exploit our weaknesses. If we don’t try to bridge our internal differences, we’re handing our enemies a gift.

In the Army, I saw firsthand the power of unity in the most challenging possible circumstances. I served, fought, and sometimes risked my life alongside people who didn’t share my background or beliefs. We had no choice but to break down the walls that separated us, to set aside our differences and focus on what bound us together: our mission and our loyalty to one another. Those experiences taught me that respect and understanding aren’t luxuries—they’re survival skills. They’re what make us strong in the face of adversity. What I try today to convey to my fellow Americans, especially those who didn’t serve in uniform and didn’t learn on the battlefield that nothing at all really divides us, is that we need to spend much less time tangling ourselves up in anger and distrust.

[Peter Wehner: How to prevent the worst from happening]

On the day in Afghanistan when I was wounded, and when three of my fellow soldiers, and a  civilian American-government employee, made the ultimate sacrifice, nothing divided me from my fellow citizens. Nothing at all. But back home, we are driven by a cycle of rhetoric that pushes us further apart. We’ve allowed ourselves to be pulled into silos of belief, where headlines and sound bites define who we are and whom we see as “other.” But we cannot let these forces tear us apart. We must find a way back to one another, not just for our children’s sake but for our own survival as a nation.

I learned something else in battle: We are all dependent on one another. I trusted people of different religions, different backgrounds, different beliefs—and they trusted me. We understood that we were one unit, and that we had to refuse to let anyone or anything break that bond. What is true for an Army unit is true for the nation: We must not let anyone break us apart.

This isn’t just about politics. It’s about our identity. We can’t afford to lose sight of what makes us strong: our ability to work through our differences, to respect one another even when we disagree. Our enemies know this. They know that the easiest way to weaken America is to fuel division from within, to make us believe that we’re enemies rather than partners. If we want to keep them from using this division against us, we have to reclaim the value of national unity.

Our greatest strength lies not in agreement, because we’re always going to disagree. We don’t even have to like one another. I learned in the Army that liking one another matters less than loving one another. We have to love what we have in common, even if we disagree. Our strength is in our shared commitment to one another as Americans. We have to listen to one another, we have to commit to not tearing one another down, and we have to show one another that we’re bigger than our differences.

After the votes are counted, we’ll have a choice to make. We can let our anger fester, exacerbating the kind of division that benefits only those who would see us weak. Or we can take this moment to turn toward one another, to seek understanding over judgment, to stop letting anyone—politicians, pundits, news channels—tell us whom we should hate or fear.

[Read: Election Day is just the beginning]

This isn’t easy work. It takes courage to open ourselves to perspectives that challenge our own. But we owe it to ourselves, to our neighbors, and, yes, to the next generation, to try. Our enemies would love nothing more than to see us fail. Let’s deny them that satisfaction. Let’s be the nation we know we can be—strong, resilient, and united, not in perfect agreement, but in purpose and respect for one another.

Now is the time to rise above what divides us, and reclaim our common goal. This election is not an ending, but a beginning—a moment to choose a path of empathy, resilience, and respect. The challenges we face—from threats abroad to struggles here at home—demand a unity that transcends politics. We cannot afford to see one another as enemies; our true strength lies in our ability to hold together even in disagreement. America was built on the resilience and diversity of its people, on a willingness to struggle and compromise to find common ground. Let us commit, today and every day, to building a nation where our differences deepen our resolve, where our shared purpose makes us strong. If we truly believe in America, we must believe in one another. Our future depends on it.